You are currently browsing the tag archive for the ‘Eddie Furlong’ tag.

I just spent a good minute typing ‘wikipedia’ and being confused as to why I couldn’t log into my blog. Which just goes to prove that I’m at my most pointless on friday afternoons.  You know what else is pointless?

If you guessed douching ads then….

Brrrnn – you are WRONG. Surveys is the correct answer. Surveys are more pointless than douching ads because douching ads serve to educate and surveys serve to survey. Let’s get started shall we?

1. Do you watch little kid shows on channels like PBS and Qubo? What the hell is Qubo? Someone please tell me.

2. Do you like laws that require restaurants to list the calories for each item directly on their main menu? Do I? Hell yes, I more than like them. I looooove them, I want to take those calorie laws to the beach and put my arm around them and maybe splash a little in the sand but not too much because I don’t want to mess up my hair and then I want to lay those calorie laws down….

3. Should abstinence-only sex education be taught to cats and dogs as a more affordable alternative to spaying and neutering? aahahahahahahahahahaha

4. Would you rather meet the author of your favorite book/story, or one of the characters? Let’s see…I read Japanese homoerotic comics so….I’m going to go with characters. Plural. Mmmmmmmm.

5. Would you get a pet rat? Pet Rat is an oxymoron. Anyone who owns a rat and calls it ‘pet’ is a moron. Rats are morons.

6. Who would you rather date: Daniel Radcliffe OR Robert Pattinson? I don’t want to date either of these ladies.

TANGENT – speaking of ladies, I’m seriously disappointed that no one on my facebook reached out in my time of need concerning this. I was very upset and beside myself – LOOK AT HOW PUDGY EDS IS! He needs an intervention otherwise we could be looking at an Elvis level situation here. Oh and not paying child support and doing drugs is bad too.

Now I’m distracted from my survey from googling Eddie. It’s leading me down a dark path. A pudgy, slighly assholic, dark path.

The coolest thing that comes up when you search windows images for "clip art" - I was wanting it to be a little more meta but this will do.

and some therapy – stat.

So, there I was, starting to do my weekly Eddie Furlong google when I came across this.  Basically, a New York Times fashion writer put up one picture of the GORGEOUS WANT TO BE HER WANT TO DECORATE MY WALLS WITH HER BODY Christina Hendricks and it was distorted.  They later replaced the photo with the original. Here they both are.

Now personally, I think both look pretty stunning.  The one on the left (your left, not the computer’s) is clearly a bit stretched.  The writer, Cathy Horyn (who neglects to include a picture), claims it was an error and since replaced it.  So whatever, scandal! and, lying bitch!

What really bothers me is the straight cattiness of the whole thing.  Look, I get that fashion is a part of the whole awards season. I love it.  It’s the only part I watch and I’ve totally been known to let a “wtf?  Is she wearing a dead animal snuggie?” fly.

Still, I resist commenting on the actresses actual bodies.  You want to know why?  Because they all rock.  I repeat, they all rock.  These women are hot.  From Meryl Streep, to Mo’Nique, to the bombshell that is Christina Hendricks.

The other thing that got me was addressing the size issue and then putting a picture up.  Really writer?  You couldn’t put up a picture of the other thousand women you thought looked good?  You had to pick the girl you were calling fat?  Nice.

So let’s just assume that in some place other than the New York Times office people actually thought that Christian Hendricks was too fat and don’t “put a big girl in a big dress” applied. I would still call “shenagins” on that.  Absolutely put big girls in big dresses.  Own it!  Big dresses are made to be sashayed and it’s soooo not about your size that pulls it off.  It’s about your attitude.

It’s about putting on your ruffles, your DD bra, your sweet ass red lipstick and your stomping boots and strutting down the red carpet/office corridor/home entryway and own. ning. it. Bam!  Like that.  Like this.

I don’t want to get into body image issues today.  Today I want you to bounce your boobs and blow a kiss.

I love you bitches.

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