I had to take to the bloggedy for this. Because a “friend” and I are having a moral debate. And in general, I’m not really a fan of the whole morality issue so when I engage in moral debates I find myself kind of at a disadvantage.

Here’s the deal. First, understand that dolphins are super-smart, peaceful creatures that aren’t even imaginary like our friend Unicorn Stud. No, they are real! I know! They live in our oceans and manage to handle the pressure of being mammal/fish. How does that even work? It’s magic. Like magnets.

These creatures probably have a lot to offer humankind. They have psychic bonds to the sun and shit. You know what I could use on a daily basis? Psychic connections to the universe. Even though I’m pretty sure I’m partly psychic, mostly with when an episode of Bones is on a channel I hadn’t previously thought of, I would like to be fully psychic. Dolphins can do this for me.

So it makes PERFECT sense to throw yourself into the ocean with a bunch of crystals and give birth with our dolphin friends. I see no problem with this.

I do have a problem with stating that ocean dolphin births are somehow immoral. I struggle with morality anyway. Mainly because, as far as I get, morality is not attached to any consequences. Even if that baby is born with dolphin knowledge, it’s still wrong to have been born in the ocean. According to my “friend” who hates dolphins. Like an asshole.

What’s right, according to this dolphin hating jerk (did I mention he hates dolphins), is having the baby in a hospital with human doctors and blah. That would be the moral choice.

And yet. And…yet. I don’t think that’s moral. I may even go out on a limb and say I don’t think that’s all that rational. Hospitals are fine but I’ve had two friends give birth at home and they were more than happy about that. I’ve had others question their morality about giving birth at home.

It is not immoral to decide to give birth in the ocean. I was going to write a lot about how I feel about the concept of morality and if it even is a concept or an inherent human trait but instead I realized that –

I NEED A FANCY DOLPHIN CONTEST!!!!

Bitches!!!! Yes. Let’s do this.

Double points for dolphins with babies.

Triple points for dolphins and pregnant ladies.

This isn't really a good fancy dolphin. Just more proof that the internet loves pink shit.

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