That’s science.

These diamonds can’t cut through a pipe? I’m so confused!

We’ve got a Lex Luthor situation here and it’s really beginning to freak me out.

In other news, I’m back in love with my dentist. We had a brief falling out over some scheduling problems. I was all, “It’s called a calendar stupid!”  Calendars and schedules are designed to make our lives easier. Try it.

Unfortunately, you have to be able to both know what day you are on and tell time to use a schedule and that is really hard for some people. People like children. And dentist receptionists.

But I got in and serviced (heeheehee) by the lovely Dr. Chang.  Then, after me telling him the music playing was the 80s (um, hello?) he was all, “oh you probably can’t even remember the 80s” (meaning I’m so young).  Awesome.

In other other news, I found this blog on the wordpress front page and it is so cute.

You’re a Grown Man

In other other other news, did you see that Prince William might marry Kate Middleton? I heard this when People magazine told me in the dentist office. I have no idea who this lady is but I am looking straight forward to a royal wedding!

Unnaturally so, I think. Because I’ve actually been planning it for them.

Here’s what I need:

I'm thinking like this - only people sized.

A gold carriage because  – duh

Horses with gold and diamond bridles  – to pull the carriage

A Vera Wang dress (except I might rethink this as VW is kind of over and her dresses are more like drowned on the Titanic then royal, you know?)

About a million white roses.

The colors are gold and diamonds.

A fountain that shoots champaign.

Make that a diamond fountain that shoots champaign.

A drunk “inner circle” friend to spill the secret that William is hooking up with his wedding planner. SCANDLE!

Finally, I need Prince Harry to not be a douche for one second so we can have a civil and tasteful union.

What to serve on the menu? Do you think the Queen will be put off by all this? She seems a very sensible lady. Perhaps I should reign (pun!) it in a little?

Hmmm, so much to think about. Mainly how I can fake a resume and get myself to England to get hired as the planner. Thanks to the internet this should be easy enough.

You know, if BP doesn’t blow a hole in the ocean.

If that happens I think a little tact is required and I’ll change the colors to silver and emeralds.

What would you put in a royal wedding? Danny is not allowed to comment because he will only suggest offensive things.