Coffee refreshed. I’m ready to go.

Crystal – They call her Mama Sox which I can totally see. They show her cuddling with her kid and generally being awesome. Everyone loves her and Siobhan especially which is making me like Siobhan. Show, quit it.

She’s singing “Come Together”. Of course, she rocks it. Her voice is so unique and powerful. There’s not really a lot to say that I haven’t said before. Love her. Love that diddgereedoo. Love how comfortable she is onstage. Love her talk behind the stage. Keep on keepin on I guess.

Tim – The contestants confirm what we’ve all pretty much suspected. There’s not a whole lot to Tim besides a smile and a cow gaze. But that’s all there needs to be. Tim is happy being Tim.

He’s singing “All My Lovin”.  That’s the breaking point. Zombie Lennon hauls himself out of the grave to go looking for talent and brains. Tim survives.

This is actually a good song for him. And he knows it. Maybe. Mostly I think he just finally said, “I’m going to do this to get laid. Whatever song will do that, I’m singing it.” which is the most rock and roll thing to do. He’s adorable. But still clothed. That’s going to have to change.

The judges are kind of gobsmacked that he managed to pull out a decent enough performance. I think we’ll see Tim next week! Yay!

Casey – oh Casey. My friend M thinks he’s (and I quote) hubba hubba. I’m not quite sure how drunk she was when she made that statement. I’m not sure she drinks so maybe he really is cute and it’s just the whole wavey hair, dented chin, guffaw face that throws me off? The contestants talk about how loud he laughs which doesn’t sound like much of a compliment to me.

He’s singing “Jealous Guy”.  BO’D!

Except…no, wow, ok. I’m feeling this. Show, wtf – I cannot love vaccine riddled CJ. Can’t.  But, am. He’s good. This is the perfect song for his voice and his stalker-in-the-attic look. I actually think he might have a soul. He better watch out for Zombie McCartney.

Ahhh, ok, shaky off the meds stare at the end puts me back to reality. You’re one creepy asshole Casey.

Siobhan – everyone talks about how “weeeiiiirdd” Siobhan is. Like they haven’t seen all the Emily the Strange stickers everywhere. Big glasses and purple tights don’t make you unique, they just make you loud. Then she makes this hilarious squinched up face and fuck if I don’t want to be her friend.

She prances on stage in her showhorse outfit complete with pony hair. This had better be good. I’m wanting her to rip it off Like a Virgin style. Instead she just sits there singing “Across the Universe”. It’s really dull and, as Randy Jackson says, sleepy. Yawn. Next.

Lee – cue the cutest thing I have ever seen on Idol. The contestants all joke about how Lee and Andrew are lovers who love each other all the time. Crystal actually says she hopes they have little Danny Gokey babies!!!!!!! Awesome!  Lee and Andrew just smile and let themselves be filmed going to bed (with a clapper!), calling each other ‘buddy’.  Aw.

Finally a decent fansign – DeWyze is De One!  Yes!

He’s singing “Hey Jude”. Meh. But then! Then! This bagpipe guy comes marching down the steps! It’s great! THEN the bagpipe guy starts to rock out with Lee and Lee just stands there like it’s the most normal thing in the world. Take note Siobhan, this is how you do strange.

Even Danny stops to watch. Fox claps and says, “Thank you!” Indeed, Fox, indeed.

ha, Ellen says that she was proud of him for not getting distracted when that “bagpiper got seperated from his parade”.

And yes, ok it distracted from the kind of not good vocals but it was a bagpiper! I don’t see why so many internet bots hated it. Boo haters. Except when you hate the things I hate.

It was all pretty good. If I had to guess I would say Tim, Andrew or Siobhan in the bottom three. You?